''The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” Mahatma Gandhi

for·give  (fr-gv, fôr-)

v.tr.

1. To excuse for a fault or an offense; pardon.

2. To renounce anger or resentment against.

Forgiveness should not be confused with ignoring or forgetting, because that is the cowards way of dealing with problems  …  when someone you care about hurts you, it is normal to be angry, and have thoughts of revenge, in the initial stages … but to not grow and move on from these hate feelings is not moving forward.

Forgiveness does not mean that your relationship with that person will be the same again, and it does not mean that you have excused the betrayal. Forgiveness means that you have accepted that persons actions, your opinions on that person may change, or maybe an opinion was confirmed. 

Some people are able to resume relationships where they left off, before everything changed. I personally go by this quote

‘Once bitten, twice shy’

The second chance thing never really works for me because you will never have the whole me, I will always keep something back, and the difference in relationship is very visible.

Being able to forgive does feel good, most of 2010, I was angry, and felt deeply betrayed, but I was able to turn a negative into a positive. I have learned to not expect too much from humans, because at the end of the day we are all humans, and humans make mistakes.

This experience has also made me less naïve, just because I would take the shirt of my back for you, I should not expect the same back.  I do look in Bellas face and think ... ‘you had sex with Edward’ but I like that it’s a reality to check to not get to comfortable.

I do actually feel better now that I have forgiven her, but forgiveness or to forgive her was never forced on me none of my friends encouraged it, or was pessimistic about it, it was just something that came natural over time, and a lot of thinking.  

Forgiveness is not a sign of weakness; it is not excusing evil, tolerating abuse or smothering pain. On the contrary, forgiveness is the trait of the brave; faced with evil they look straight in the face of evil, call it what it is and while consciously aware of the terror and sting of the evil they deliberately choose to overcome evil with good.

By embracing forgiveness, you embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy.
Saint Leigh